Saddle Up for another round

It was just a matter of time before Junia came out of the closet again, asking for her rightful place around the proverbial "women in ministry" table. Tim Challies, who always seems to stir the pot (but takes his hands off the spoon I might add, after the sizzling begins) was the culprit this time around and his blog tips on scripture reading. The complementarians and egalitarians saddled up again and took fire at one another on his blog.

One of my favorite cowboys, Scott McKnight joined in lassoed a post in response, the new it girl for all things ladies, Rachel Held Evans chimed in and called us ladies to pick up the task of prophets. My favorite Canadian Mummy said she is too pooped to fight anymore, and gave up her seat at the table.

Seems everyone saddled up for this one. Even Kinnon and Jared Wilson took a few pokes on Twitter.

I'm late to the game, as this blog has been for the past few years. My apologies.

But though I agree with the sentiments of my fellow ladies, to live out our callings anyways, in our quest for liberation and freedom from having to prove our place at the table...I worry for us.

I worry that in our zeal and poetic language, in our fervor and passion, we will miss that perhaps some still need to wrestle and "come to dinner" if you will, with the predominately white, evangelical men that rule the web, the publishing world, and the podcasts of Christendom.

I worry that while dancing with the outcasts, and prophesying with the radicals, that we will miss the call to still poke and prod at the tattered theology keeping women out of "the game".

We women can live out our callings, without the permission of those who would rather see us silent but still miss the mark on this subject.

What if God, in all His women loving wisdom, is asking some of us ladies to still knock at the door of the dinner party, and remind our fellow brothers that we are still outside, and we aren't leaving. Not only are we not leaving, we are armed with some scriptures, some stories, and some scars they need to see and hear.

Ladies, I feel you.

Trust me I do.

I penned a contribution to a conference two years ago that addressed this very issue, but my submission was ignored. More than my disappointment that I couldn't share on this topic was the disappointment that no one at that significant conference addressed the issue of women in leadership.

In the defense of the conferences planners, whom I love, respect and admire, they likely thought the issue had been flogged to death.

And they are right.

It is has.

But we are still crying out.

We are still crying out in the dessert.

Even in the emerging/emergent/emerged/reformed/affirming/catholic/mainline/charismatic/you name it...we are still crying out.

And there is a good chance, that we will be crying for years to come.

But ladies, don't give up the good fight to dance outside in the rain. Some of you have voices that need to be heard. Some of you have theological dissertations that need to be shared. Some of you have words that need to be penned.

And for some of us, we need you to keep battling so that we can find our voice, gain our strength, and take over in the years to come.

We may not get the invitation to dine with the men's club just yet, but some of us still need to stand on stools outside and pelt the windows with pebbles.

Just reminding them, we might be out of sight, but we aren't out of mind.

TEDxWaterloo and The Disconnect

I have the incredible privilege of being apart of the Marcomm (Marketing and Communications) team for TEDxWaterloo. If you are not familiar with the TED format, you are missing out. Thousands of TED talks await you here. The TEDx’s are locally-grown editions of the famed TED conference. TEDxWaterloo is a wonderful edition to the TED family, and it has been a pleasure working with them for the 2012 edition.

I had the honor of writing a piece for the website, and it posted last week on the site. Here are a few thoughts on this years theme, on "Disconnected". Though I had no hand in picking the theme, the idea of "Disconnected" has been near and dear to my heart this past year and writing about it was effortless.

The Disconnect

Can you remember the first time that someone hung up on you?

I mean really hung up on you.

The phone slamming, angry adverbs, mid-sentence cut off, came out of left field kind of hang up?

I can remember my first experience with an angry hang up like it was yesterday. NKOTB and their classic hit “Please Don’t Go Girl” was blaring through my tape deck, as my 12 year old eyes cried a million tears over a boy who shouted into his rotary phone “We are over” and followed his decree with a resounding slam. It was the first time my teenage self had discovered the sense of powerlessness you experience when you are disconnected from so abruptly. It was the first time that I learned the power you wield when you break communication with another and disconnect without an explanation. In a world so full of opportunities to communicate it is a shame that so many of us communicate so poorly, and take the easy road of the disconnect from people and situations when they become difficult.

As I have grown older and have more tools at my disposal then ever to connect and communicate, I sometimes feel more lost than ever before. I have often wondered then if poor communication doesn’t disconnect souls, but rather it’s the disconnected souls who poorly communicate. If that statement could have a nugget of truth, then where does that leave us, as we find the promise and power of connection and our contributions to the communities that we find ourselves in? Where does it leave us when communication has never been so important, yet has never been more misunderstood and misused?

I am not sure what the answers are, and maybe for now, I don’t to figure it all out. Perhaps the answer is fluid and malleable as we constantly recalibrate in an ever changing world. Maybe the most important thing is that we are searching for an answer, together and connected, through an outlet like TEDxWaterloo, wresting through these inevitable tensions.

Seth Godin once said “Connect the disconnected to each other and you create value” I am sure in his marketing guru genius he was talking about connecting products to people, but I can’t help but wonder if that same statement applies person to person. When we connect with one another, in new and meaningful ways, when we choose connectedness over the disconnect, we then create value because of what we create together.

We have all heard the line “two heads are better than one” and “we are stronger together then we are divided”. Maybe sometimes clichés are clichés because they are true. Maybe finding our connectedness and looking for the answers of how each of us, in our own context, can hang up once and for all on our disconnectedness, is the most powerful force on earth for change. Maybe there is hope beyond the disconnect and maybe for now, that hope is enough.

What if you are your biggest problem?

If you want to be a write. Write.

If you want to be a singer. Sing.

If you want to starting your own business. Start it.

If you want to lose weight. Cut your calories.

If you want to learn how to juggle swords of death. Practice.

If you want to climb Mount Everest. Book your ticket.

If you want to jump into the unknown. Put one foot in front of the other.

Each whimsical wish that we have, each fanciful idea that we conjure up finds birth or dies with our action or inaction.

We either make it happen, or we don't.

It really is as simple as that.

I am getting increasingly tired of hearing others, and more importantly myself, come up with every reason under the sun why we can't live out our dreams.

It was a great tune 10 years ago, but now, it is one played out record.

You either make it happen.

Or you don't.

You either try.

Or you don't.

What's the worst that could happen? You either fail trying or fail without starting.

But what if you started and you won?

What if you climbed the mountain, lost the weight and made millions as an entrepreneur?

What if your inaction is the only hindrance?

What if you are your biggest problem?

Whether it is stagnant faith or a stagnant life, whether you can or can't change it, is really up to you.

I am heading to the studio this month to record my...whatever it becomes.

An album.

One song.

Or one rough time for my poor patient producer.

I don't live in a make believe world where I think I am the best singer, or song writer for that matter.

But I am going to try.

And it seems that success or failure hangs in that balance.

Gungor "When Death Dies"

This is why I desire to make music that matters...

Presentensions - The lie of acquired significance

I had the extreme privilege of speaking at the Presentensions conference in Toronto on May 20th. I was surrounded by people whom I hold in the highest regard and with the utmost respect. Voices that are so important to the future of the church anywhere, I was nervous to have mine echoing with theirs.

I was quite overwhelmed with the positive response I received when I presented. I was warmed when the crowd laughed along, and encouraged when I heard the "hmmm's" in the more poignant moments. I was not expecting so many people to approach me afterward and share with me. I will never be able to express how much the kind words and compliments meant to me.

It has been an overwhelming year to say the least. Coping with change, losing a loved one and changing careers has been difficult. But in the midst of difficulty, God has brought redemption and strength. It has been a tremendously sad and at the same time, joyous year for me

In my most difficult days, clinging to the truth that I am valuable to God, just because, was a difference maker. When I experienced situations that made me doubt my worth, God reminded me of how utterly worthy I was in His eyes. I couldn't help but wonder if I would ever get the chance to share this tremendous truth I learned with a wider audience, and speak to the worth of the church on a whole.

And along came Presentensions..

For the many friends and fellow travelers who asked for a transcript of my talk, I hope it reminds you how valuable you are, just because you are!

When I was 5, I was convinced I was going to be a talk show host. This was long before the days of Oprah, or Ellen. I wore capes, and top hats, and made countless tape recordings of me interviewing imaginary movie stars and singers. I rode a unicorn, ate Jello with Bill Cosby and thought I would one day be a somebody.e of your childhood days and imagine Jesus telling you exactly who you are, and make that the benchmark of significance in your life.

I, as most, lost the flair for the imaginative as I grew older. I began to think critically and analytically about things and ceased to reside in the land of make-believe. I stopped making my tape recordings and I put my top hat on a shelf. I may have forgotten some of my childhood dreams, the whimsy of make believe and play, but I did hold on to one thing. The belief that one day I would be somebody. People would know my name. And being schooled in the halls of evangelicalism since I was young, I married this belief of my supposed “soon to be” stardom with my belief in God, and it was a match made in superstar Christian heaven.

When I peel back the layers of time, and envision myself standing in the garden with Adam and Eve, I can understand how tempting that apple looked. Not only was it red, shiny and fabulous, it was also whispering and taunting Eve to come, to do something, become significant.

Be somebody Eve.

If you incline your ear to the sound you can hear the echo throughout history. Our whole fallen world has bought into the lie of acquired significance. That if we just somehow work a little harder, achieve something a little greater, then we will be somebody. Then we will matter, then we will really be all we were meant to be.

And it is not just the world that has embraced the lie of acquired significance.

May I humbly submit that when I glance through the pews of the church of Canada, and search through the sanctuaries, I can see the evidence of the lie of acquired significance. I can hear its subtle whispers…be somebody…be somebody. I can see the pastorate fighting the cloak of acquired significance, that seeks to cover them and envelope their ministries. I see it in the faces of my fellow brother and sisters as they repeat the mantra that our culture teaches us “I have to achieve something, impress someone, be the hero”

I hear the lie call out in the conferences and gatherings that we attend. The whisper that tells us our success is found in numbers, book sales, blog stats and retweets. That our significance as the church of Canada comes when we have started the new building campaign, hired yet another pastor, and tossed some money at the soup kitchen downtown.

So as the bride of Christ here in the Great White North of Canada, we have tried almost anything to be somebody. We embraced street evangelism, the Gathers, revivals and or “blessings”. We “kissed dating goodbye” took the Teen Mania challenge and engaged our social justice initiatives. We decided the only music God liked was from Australia, and tried living simply for awhile. We decided we didn’t like pastors, then went to school to become them, and now aren’t even sure if we need them. Some of us got “Left Behind”, prayed to Jabez three times a day, and looked for 40 days to try and find our purpose. We took some spiritual gift inventories, then tried for awhile to do some spiritual warfare and bought a WWJD bracelet for good measure. We are still trying to figure out if we were, or still are or could be emerging/ emergent /emerged. We made promises with the promise keepers, tried to become contagious Christians, and even tried to shed some pounds with the weighed down workshops. We have looked for our significance everywhere and from anyone

In an irony so acute it's almost painful, it is no wonder that the church of Canada is starting to be a landscape populated by Pentecostal-style charismatic’s with therapeutic, church growth oriented churches.

Those of course are the churches that like to remind us, we can be somebody.

We have acted as if God was a trite being who looked upon our significance like a stock that goes up and down depending on performance.

I am no theologian, nor do I deem myself the most knowledgeable when it comes to the debates ad intellectual posturing many Christians engage in. Listen, the first time I heard the word Zizek, I replied “gazuntit”. But I just can’t help but wonder if the Church here in Canada forgot how significant we are to God, just because.

It like the good news that we are important to God, and that we cannot acquire it, or achieve it, has become the old news. Our dismissal of the “feel-good” gospel message that ran ramped in the 90’s caused us to forget that sometimes the gospel does feel good. It is a by product of the gift of Christ that we dare not throw aside, lest we forget it all together. The church in Canada, the dazzling bride has more significance, meaning and worth than she can possibly comprehend. And the truth is you and I and the whole beautiful body had significance and worth before we ever even glanced upon the face of Christ. No matter how many converts or cathedrals we make, no matter how many baptisms or backsliders we engage; we are significant to Christ.

As the parable in Luke 15 highlights, we really are God’s coin. Whether or not we know it, or have forgotten it, or aren’t even sure we are theologically comfortable with it, we are deeply and personally important to God. We are that significant to him. The coin in the parable does not one thing to earn this significance, and neither do we. We simply are significant to Christ.

My sincere hope for the Future of the Church of Canada is that we become masters at the art of tight rope walking. My hope is that we can become masters of the art of maintaining balance, while walking along a tensioned wire of living in the fullness of God’s significance, and yet using our gifts. All the while trying to not fall into the trap acquired significance.

It may initially seem almost impossible to be motivated by anything else other than the never ending search for significance. We seem to be the masters of our own personal PR machines, so even if we aren't doing anything all that important, we can Facebook and tweet that we are. So at least our friends will think we are somebody. If we want to be motivated by the right intentions, we will have to do the hard work to always be in touch with our motivations, recalibrating them and holding them up to the light of Christ. We all experience some degree of giftedness from God, and are all called to display those gifts. It will be that fine balance that keeps in check if we are living out that expression, or if we are working to achieve something already freely given.

The irony of course, is that people who are living out of that fullness of significance, that came before their gift not because of, and came through a gift that God has given, usually make the loudest splashes in life. As they live out of that fullness, they engage the world differently.

The future of the church of Canada is facing a new landscape. Most of the industrialized world has now realized that the industrial revolution is fading. The years of growing productivity, and the ever increasing middle class is ending. People in omidst, in our pews and those we are yet to meet are all facing new realities. Men and Women who believed they had a valuable and needed skill, or trade, or degree are now discovering that there is no such thing as job security any longer. People who believed they could find their worth and importance in what they did, what they achieved and what they could create with the sweat of their brow, are now facing an un certain crisis.

If we, the church, cannot stand up and call out from the steeples that there is a God, who sees their significance, one that they do not have to acquire, then we my brothers and sisters, we will be in trouble.

The message of significance will must always be partnered with the message of the Gospel. But the mysterious and marvelous truth that not only does God desire that we be free from the bondage to sin, but that whether we succeed or fail, our significance doesn’t change, is a message we need to hear more often.

So as we learn the art of tight rope walking, don’t try to be a superstar, church of Canada. Don’t falter back and try to acquire your significance. I really can’t handle another 40 days of purpose, and I am sold my WWJD bracelet at a garage sale last year.